Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see.
It's getting hard to be someone but it all works out.
It doesn't matter much to me.
No one I think is in my tree, I mean it must be high or low.
That is you can't you know tune in but it's all right.
That is I think it's not too bad.
Let me take you down, 'cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields.
Nothing is real and nothing to get hung about.
Strawberry Fields forever.
Always no sometimes think it's me, but you know I know when it's a dream.
I think, er No, I mean, er Yes but it's all wrong.
That is I think I disagree.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
i think or at least feel as if im coming into my own, somewhat. i think im falling for language and attempting to express myself constantly. ive taken a liking to memoirs and memory and recounting memory shaping it through a place.
i think i might ask my professor from my cultural technologies of memory class to do a tutorial in the spring on memoir and anthropology. how cool.
struggling. do you do what a part of you is passionate about but you have little actual experience with, or do you go with that burning in your heart? epidemiology and public health consulting seem wonderful and practical. but so does doing my all to become a writer. then again, one can do both, can't we?
i dont like long books and treatises. i like them pocket sized. whats the point of a book that wont fit in your back pocket? you cant exactly take it around with you if its not. i think books should be about moving and traveling. they should be mobile and portable. i dont like carrying a backpack around the city.
cities cities and cities. read invisible cities by calvino in a day. the metro system was made for book readers. in fact, i read the most when im moving, on the train, on the bus, on the boat. its when i sit in my room that i read the least.
why must i always be going somewhere? its as if im afraid to be still.
working through arjun appadurai's fear of small numbers. hes an anthropologist but one of the few whose writings flow rather easily. and ive liked his other writings. they always make me ponder.
today i picked up copies of orphan pamuk's istanbul: memories and the city and v. s. naipaul's a bend in the river. im reading pamuk's now. its excellent. memories are fascinating things, especially good reflections on them.
its funny how i dont write about my internship at all.
i like it enough, but when it comes down to it, i dont feel like explaining it. im updating fact packs on environmental health hazards & summarizing and synthesizing full cost accounting reports.
gross, those two words sound awful to say out loud.
maybe its just that activism can be a little frustrating? mind games and manipulation. mostly of images. maybe its just me. but why the obsession with children's faces as a tool to get support and donations?
chej is a strong organization. i like the organizing and technical assistance component and am proud to be a part of it. im looking forward to helping write summaries of successful environmental health struggles around the country for the "action line" component of our publication, everyone's backyard. but im not huge on most of the nation-wide campaigns we run. BE SAFE, the campaign for precautionary and prevention action around things like hazardous waste and improper use of toxins before they are released to the public (what i am doing the full cost accounting for) is useful and important, i think. but the green schools and pvc campaign i just can't really get into. i know its important, toxic shower curtains and children's toys and baby bottles and all. its just not my thing really. really.
im hoping that eventually i get to go to one or two or more of these conferences that stephen, my boss, goes to. thats what id really like to do. see how you explain the science and technical stuff and use it to organize public opinion. maybe soon. either way this will be a good experience. every day is at least somewhat different.
ive been thinking about the watson. im making a list of professors at bard to email this weekend. about their area of specialty. any good resources. potential contacts.
right now im thinking...
production:
colombia
indonesia
ethiopia/angola
consumption:
turkey
greece/italy
morocco/portugal
ive love to spend a year traveling by sea, train. playing checkers and chess. smoking hookah and talking politics & philosophy. working in fields of coffee beans. fair trade. local culture. feeling the breeze. moving.
all those things i never shut up about.
im in a good mood. you'd think a weekend with nothing to do or nobody to see might be dull. but its nice in its own way.
speaking off, im off for more coffee and reading. im wearing my jean shorts right now. love it.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Monday, June 15, 2009
ive decided.
im going to be a damn good writer. im going through a new book every couple days it seems. today i was bored at work so i made a four page long reading list. public health will make a good profession-but writing nonfiction should always be in there. my friend Ups' sister works in the public health field and does international health consulting and workshops in mostly rural areas. ive decided consulting and assistance is really what i want to do. something botton up. my superviser does that, science and technical assistance. holds workshops and presentations to town hall meetings, consults via phone and email. helps interpret technical documents.
but he says that the organizing and the politics always comes above the science. the science can strengthen your argument and give some sharp evidence, but in the end its the organizing that matters.
im collecting narratives of health workers and of impacted bodies and impacted landscapes and will try and start shaping some narrative of a senior project. ive been researching dioxin through and ecosystem ecology lens in Alaska and Canada and Siberia. dioxin gets absorbed by plantkon and such, which, following the food webs and trophic interactions penetrates into the diet and collective body of fish, into seals, into whales, into birds. the ecosystem becomes saturated with dioxin. humans too, native communities that still rely on traditional food supplies of seal and whale blubber not only for diet but also for cultural legacy. and then dioxin penetrates too into their fatty tissue, into breasts, into breastmilk, contaminating the bodies of newborns and generations to come. its the landscape and the physical bodies that become toxic. its the fish, the birds, the water, the flora, the fauna, the social, tudo.
i have two classes on ecosystem ecology and too many on anthropology and so it seems to be a topic close enough to home. close indeed. studies warn not to drink non-organic milk or meat products due to the presence of dioxin. all this talk is making me think of becoming a vegetarian again. if not just for the reason Antonetta asks, "What does my body consist of?"
good question.
but so im trying to read more memoirs-that-present-themselves-in-context-of-the-landscapes-and-time. again, i have a list. its too long. but i cant get enough of it.
ok ok now enough. ive already read 1/2 of Invisible Cities by Calvino today. time to finish the rest on the porch downstairs.
im going to be a damn good writer. im going through a new book every couple days it seems. today i was bored at work so i made a four page long reading list. public health will make a good profession-but writing nonfiction should always be in there. my friend Ups' sister works in the public health field and does international health consulting and workshops in mostly rural areas. ive decided consulting and assistance is really what i want to do. something botton up. my superviser does that, science and technical assistance. holds workshops and presentations to town hall meetings, consults via phone and email. helps interpret technical documents.
but he says that the organizing and the politics always comes above the science. the science can strengthen your argument and give some sharp evidence, but in the end its the organizing that matters.
im collecting narratives of health workers and of impacted bodies and impacted landscapes and will try and start shaping some narrative of a senior project. ive been researching dioxin through and ecosystem ecology lens in Alaska and Canada and Siberia. dioxin gets absorbed by plantkon and such, which, following the food webs and trophic interactions penetrates into the diet and collective body of fish, into seals, into whales, into birds. the ecosystem becomes saturated with dioxin. humans too, native communities that still rely on traditional food supplies of seal and whale blubber not only for diet but also for cultural legacy. and then dioxin penetrates too into their fatty tissue, into breasts, into breastmilk, contaminating the bodies of newborns and generations to come. its the landscape and the physical bodies that become toxic. its the fish, the birds, the water, the flora, the fauna, the social, tudo.
i have two classes on ecosystem ecology and too many on anthropology and so it seems to be a topic close enough to home. close indeed. studies warn not to drink non-organic milk or meat products due to the presence of dioxin. all this talk is making me think of becoming a vegetarian again. if not just for the reason Antonetta asks, "What does my body consist of?"
good question.
but so im trying to read more memoirs-that-present-themselves-in-context-of-the-landscapes-and-time. again, i have a list. its too long. but i cant get enough of it.
ok ok now enough. ive already read 1/2 of Invisible Cities by Calvino today. time to finish the rest on the porch downstairs.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
more
soon ill update this.
my internship is. i research environmental health problems for communities and groups that apply to CHEJ for assistance. i help gather information into fact packs, which we then distribute to help in the understanding of the problem. my job currently consists of finding new medical studies, articles of interest, or policy updates. but more on this later. theres much more ill be doing. such as GIS mapping.
gone to the zoo.
met some of Dana's friends from American U.
might start doing Krav Maga.
spend a lot of time at Tryst, an excellent bar/coffee shop/lounge where i go to grab a Guiness w/ expresso (a Dufrain) and read a book or work on my tutorial, which i am far behind on.
the bulk of my time is spend wandering to parks, getting something nice to eat and drink, and reading. ive read 3 books so far and am constantly hungry for more. im starting another Calvino tomorrow. i love reading on the Metro.
i feel torn between wanting to do grassroots/bottom-up public health work and desperately wanting to be a writer like Chatwin or Kapuscinski or Orwell and write about the human condition. anthropological and ethnographic, but not anthropology or ethnography. its funny. a whole discipline set up around writing on the human condition and everyday life, but by a group who, far and wide, are not good writers. for it takes a lot of talent to sucessfully portray the magic of daily life and the condition. The Road to Wigan Pier was so great.
so heres some more, adapted from my amazon.com wishlist. just to add to the others, just because.
Birds Without Wings
by Louis de Bernières
Speak, Memory
by Vladimir Nabokov
Desierto: Memories of the Future (Paperback)
by Charles Bowden
Let Us Now Praise Famous Men
by James Agee
Stranger in the Village of the Sick: A Memoir of Cancer, Sorcery, and Healing
by Paul Stoller
A Field Guide to Getting Lost
by Rebecca Solnit
Lines: A Brief History
by Tim Ingold
My Life as an Explorer
by Sven Hedin
When a Crocodile Eats the Sun: A Memoir of Africa
by Peter Godwin
The Great Railway Bazaar
by Paul Theroux
The Soul of the Rhino
by Hemanta Mishra
Spider's House: A Novel
by Paul Bowles
The Voices of Marrakesh: A Record of a Visit
by Elias Canetti
i realize its ideas of the body, place, and memory that get to me, for the best writing i enjoy to read. the experience of remembering being, physically, in a space and place.
i think i will incorperate this into my senior project. Body Toxic was inspiring to read as a piece of literature but as social commentary and i think something like that...
the used bookstore in adams morgan will be a good place to start. all this reading makes me inspired, to be honest. its a nice break from everything else, even if it does lead to me being a bit anti social. but theres always the good conversations in parks with strangers.
hope for humanity.
my internship is. i research environmental health problems for communities and groups that apply to CHEJ for assistance. i help gather information into fact packs, which we then distribute to help in the understanding of the problem. my job currently consists of finding new medical studies, articles of interest, or policy updates. but more on this later. theres much more ill be doing. such as GIS mapping.
gone to the zoo.
met some of Dana's friends from American U.
might start doing Krav Maga.
spend a lot of time at Tryst, an excellent bar/coffee shop/lounge where i go to grab a Guiness w/ expresso (a Dufrain) and read a book or work on my tutorial, which i am far behind on.
the bulk of my time is spend wandering to parks, getting something nice to eat and drink, and reading. ive read 3 books so far and am constantly hungry for more. im starting another Calvino tomorrow. i love reading on the Metro.
i feel torn between wanting to do grassroots/bottom-up public health work and desperately wanting to be a writer like Chatwin or Kapuscinski or Orwell and write about the human condition. anthropological and ethnographic, but not anthropology or ethnography. its funny. a whole discipline set up around writing on the human condition and everyday life, but by a group who, far and wide, are not good writers. for it takes a lot of talent to sucessfully portray the magic of daily life and the condition. The Road to Wigan Pier was so great.
so heres some more, adapted from my amazon.com wishlist. just to add to the others, just because.
Birds Without Wings
by Louis de Bernières
Speak, Memory
by Vladimir Nabokov
Desierto: Memories of the Future (Paperback)
by Charles Bowden
Let Us Now Praise Famous Men
by James Agee
Stranger in the Village of the Sick: A Memoir of Cancer, Sorcery, and Healing
by Paul Stoller
A Field Guide to Getting Lost
by Rebecca Solnit
Lines: A Brief History
by Tim Ingold
My Life as an Explorer
by Sven Hedin
When a Crocodile Eats the Sun: A Memoir of Africa
by Peter Godwin
The Great Railway Bazaar
by Paul Theroux
The Soul of the Rhino
by Hemanta Mishra
Spider's House: A Novel
by Paul Bowles
The Voices of Marrakesh: A Record of a Visit
by Elias Canetti
i realize its ideas of the body, place, and memory that get to me, for the best writing i enjoy to read. the experience of remembering being, physically, in a space and place.
i think i will incorperate this into my senior project. Body Toxic was inspiring to read as a piece of literature but as social commentary and i think something like that...
the used bookstore in adams morgan will be a good place to start. all this reading makes me inspired, to be honest. its a nice break from everything else, even if it does lead to me being a bit anti social. but theres always the good conversations in parks with strangers.
hope for humanity.
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